Dear Phoney Fiance Read online

  “Damn, that’s pretty shitty,” he said, commiserating. “Did you ever speak to him after that?”

  “Nope. I’m not one of those girls who forgives and forgets. There was no explaining how his dick ended up in another girl’s mouth. It was over. Nothing he could possibly say would’ve ever made that okay in my mind so it was over.”

  “Yeah…I feel you. I’m the same way,” he said, leaning on his elbows. Could he look sexier? Even his cowlick was cute — and yep, he was right, that dimple was pretty irresistible, especially when it flashed at me with that half-grin like he was doing right now. “Hey, he was an asshole, you know that, right? Not every guy is like your ex.”

  “That’s the rumor,” I said wryly, returning to my beer, trying to remember that none of this was real. I had to stay on track, stay focused. I learned from my mistakes. I was naive once, wasn’t going to happen again. “Enough about me, what about you? What do I need to know about your ex?”

  “Aside from the fact that she’s a soul-sucking, gold-digging, shallow narcissist?”

  “Yeah.”

  He shrugged. “That about covers it.” Jace glanced around the bar, then reached for my hand, saying, “C’mon, you said you wanted to know if I could dance. Time to see if you can dance better than you play air hockey.”

  Ohhh, that grin might be the death of me.

  “Now who’s throwing the gauntlet?” I countered, accepting the challenge with a saucy smile thrown over my shoulder as I shared, “I was a competitive dancer my entire childhood and all four years of high school. So…yeah…I can dance. Bring it, baby, I’m going to bury you.”

  Fuck, she can dance — as in criminally-sexy-this-should-be-illegal-my-cock-will-never-recover-dance.

  Sweat poured from our bodies as we moved together, taking the dance floor like contestants from a game show shooting for big money. Her body, lithe and lean, was like silk flowing beneath my fingertips and I couldn’t get enough. My hands spanned her waist, dipping down to cup her ass. She spun around and wrapped her arm around my neck, pressing that perfect behind against my groin. God, could she tell that I was hard as stone? I gripped her hips and hauled her up tight. If she didn’t know before, she had to know now.

  The music throbbed all around us, people oblivious except to anything but their own pleasure, which was fine by me. A hunger was riding my insides and I knew exactly what I wanted but damn, we made that stupid rule.

  No, it was a good rule for a solid reason but my hands were shaking I wanted to touch her so bad. I wanted to taste every inch of that body until I knew every nook and cranny by heart.

  Fuck this. I couldn’t grind against Cara, simulating the act of sex without wanting to throw her over my shoulder and finding a dark corner to nail her to the wall. If I was going to keep my head on straight, I needed a change in scenery.

  “You want to get out of here?” I asked against the shell of her ear so she could hear me above the music. She bobbed her head with an eager smile and I lead her out of the loud bar. “Did you drive?” I asked.

  “I took an Uber,” she answered, wiping the sweat from her brow, her breath pluming in the cold air. It’d been hot in the bar but the night air outside the bar was typically frosty for St. Louis in February. “You?”

  “My truck’s parked over there,” I said, motioning for her to follow.

  “Ohhh, a truck, super masculine,” she teased, flashing me that mega-watt smile I was beginning to crave. “Please tell me it’s lifted and gets, like really terrible gas mileage.”

  “Guilty but in my defense, when I bought it I wasn’t as evolved as I am now but I should get some points for the fact that it’s completely paid off and when I do buy a new car I’m saving up for an energy-efficient Tesla, right?”

  “Will you fit in a Tesla?” she asked.

  “When I test drive one, I’ll let you know.”

  We rounded the corner to the lot where my truck was parked and Cara cast me a mischievous look, saying, “I’m just giving you a hard time. Your ride is sweet. Not that a Tesla wouldn’t be sweet as well but this is pretty nice.”

  I laughed, relieved that she didn’t think I was some kind of dick because of what I drove. Some people were judgy about that stuff. Especially nowadays. I mean, I get it. I wasn’t some eco-jerk with a burn-the-planet mentality but I wasn’t a granola-munching hippie either. Probably somewhere in the middle.

  “So where we going?” she asked, finger combing her dark hair after dancing had tousled her wild mane. “The night is still relatively young but we should go someplace with good lighting so we can take some more pics to post on social media.”

  I suppressed an annoyed sigh. Fuck social media. I didn’t want to share Cara with everyone on my friend list. I know that was irrational — the whole point of our arrangement was to appear that we were head-over-heels in love so that we sold the engagement to Alyssa and Jordan but I wanted to put that aside for a minute.

  “Have you ever been out to Lushmeadow Look-out?”

  “It sounds like a place where teenagers go to make out,” she said, biting back an amused grin. At my nod, she shook her head. “No, seeing as I’m not a teenager and not currently dating anyone, well, aside from you, sort of, I haven’t had a reason to go park, if you will.”

  “Well, want to go make-out?” I was half-joking, half-not. Kissing was allowed, per our rules and I wanted any excuse to put my lips on hers. “You said I was cleared for more kissing, as I recall.”

  She laughed, the sound like music to my soul. “I did say that. Do you think we can keep it to just kissing?”

  I scoffed at her concern. “We’re adults. We can control ourselves,” I assured her. “Like you said, we have to be able to sell it. So far, we’ve only had one kiss…I mean, I think we need to swap some more spit, if you know what I mean.”

  “Solid argument, if not a little graphic” she said. “Okay, let’s go make out, you fine-ass weirdo.”

  I feigned offense as I pulled out the parking lot. “I’m the weirdo? Hell girl, you put mustard on your French fries and then washed it down with your beer. If that’s not weird — and disgusting — I don’t know what is.”

  “It was delicious.”

  No, baby girl, you’re delicious.

  “So how’d you know about this place?” she asked as we pulled up and parked on the bluff overlooking the city.

  “I actually grew up around here, the next city over. Our high schools were rivals,” I admitted.

  “Ohhh, my God, you came here to make out, didn’t you?” she squealed with laughter as she unbuckled her seatbelt. “How many bras did you unsnap on this bluff?”

  “Too many to count,” I admitted but there was only one bra I was interested in tonight. Stick to kissing, Romeo. Contrary to what I’d told Cara, I felt like a kid, not an adult right now. I was shaking, I wanted her so bad. I reached for her, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. Her bright, teasing smile turned into something less goofy and the moment changed between us. That electric tension returned and I pulled her toward me. “You’re something else, Cara. Unlike anyone I’ve ever met.”

  “Don’t say stuff like that,” she murmured.

  “Why not?”

  “It’s not necessary.”

  “It’s not a line. It’s true.”

  She thought I was still playing the part. I know I should be but what I was feeling was real.

  “Just kiss me,” she said, leaning toward me, her scent filling my senses. I didn’t hesitate. I sealed my mouth to hers, that wild energy pulsing between us like a live wire. Our tongues tangled with the same urgency of reunited lovers after a long separation. She groaned against my mouth. I needed to taste more than just her lips. I wanted to lick the salt from the tender spot where her shoulder met her neck. I wanted to feel her shiver as I pressed kisses down her belly.

  In such a short time, Cara had become so much more than just a cool chick who was helping me out and, fuck, I didn’t understand how or why it’d
happened but I was struggling to remember why it was a bad idea to explore the option of something more.

  “Oh my God, Jace, you’re such a good kisser,” she moaned. My pride — and my cock — swelled with her praise. Baby girl, let me show you what else I’m good at. “Your ex was an idiot.”

  “So was yours,” I growled but I was beginning to realize their loss was our gain. If her idiot ex hadn’t stupidly messed around on Cara, she wouldn’t be in my truck right now. “Anyone who doesn’t see that you’re a fucking catch is blind and doesn’t deserve you.”

  Her gaze softened in the moonlight and she fairly glowed. If I lived to be a hundred, I’d never forget how beautiful Cara looked in that moment. Unguarded, lips swollen and pink, cheeks flushed, hair wild — my mental snapshot caught every detail. She reached out to softly knuckle my cheek. “That’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me. Thank you, Jace.”

  I didn’t want her thanks. I wanted her to know that what I felt was genuine, that I wasn’t just throwing her a bone because we’d just had our tongues down each other’s throats. But we were in a weird place and I didn’t think I should share what I was really thinking and feeling.

  For one, it was too soon to feel any of the things banging around in my head and two, that’s not what either of us signed on for and I wasn’t about to send her running off.

  “No need to thank me,” I said, grasping her hand. “You’re the shit, you know?”

  The fragile intimate moment around us popped like a soap bubble and we both felt it. Cara put a little distance between us with a cheerful smile saying, “I think we are straight killing our kissing sessions. If we were being graded, easy ‘A’ on the books.”

  I forced a chuckle, hiding my disappointment. I wanted more but Cara seemed content to keep things light and status quo. “Well, it helps to have a stellar study partner,” I quipped in keeping with her banter. “That’s how I got my degree.”

  “Same,” she admitted. “If it weren’t for Rachel and Daisy, I don’t know how I would’ve graduated. They have better study skills than me.”

  I didn’t want to take her home just yet. I wanted any excuse to spend more time with her, even if it meant keeping my hands to myself when I wanted her naked beneath me. “Okay, so what do you do for a living? I guess I should know that stuff about my future fiancee.”

  “Solid point,” she agreed, settling against the door so she could face me. “Right, so, I graduated with a communications degree and a journalism minor but as everyone knows journalism is practically dead nowadays so I went into broadcasting. Currently, I’m a production assistant over at KQWE Network, which is as lowly as you can get on the production scale. The pay is laughable and the humiliation is daily but I get the chance to work up the ladder and beef up my resume so I can eventually make my way out of St. Louis.”

  “Where do you want to end up?”

  “New York or Los Angeles,” she answered without hesitation.

  Her naked ambition — much like her competitive streak — was hot as fuck. Alyssa had always been lacking in that department, more content to drift, which had been a bone of contention between us. How in the hell had I missed such a big red flag when we’d been dating?

  “How about you?”

  “Not as exciting as broadcasting. I went the business route. Business economics, to be exact.”

  “Numbers guy,” she said with a playful wrinkle of her nose that was too adorable. “I won’t hold that against you.”

  “Math is the universal language, baby girl.”

  She pursed her lips with mock puzzlement. “And here I thought love was the universal language.”

  “That’s just a brilliant marketing campaign,” I said, wanting so badly to pull her into my lap and kiss those sassy lips. Her personality would make her a star someday. She had that certain something that you couldn’t fake, couldn’t buy but people would sell their soul for.

  “You plan to stay here in St. Louis?” she asked.

  I sensed something beneath her question. Something deeper. I didn’t want to grasp at smoke but was it possible that Cara felt something more than she let on? Maybe I wasn’t alone in this?

  I chose my words carefully. “I go where the money’s good. I’m not married to any one place.”

  “So you’d be willing to move?”

  I shrugged. “If the right opportunity presented itself, sure. I mean, I’ll still be a Cardinals fan, no matter where I go but yeah, moving isn’t a problem.”

  Her expression screwed into a grimace. “Cardinals?…I suppose no one is perfect.”

  Ahhh, hell. I’d just found her flaw.

  Rachel caught me as I was curling my hair, the look on her face promised a conversation that I’d been avoiding.

  “So, your social media has been popping,” she said, folding her arms across her chest with an expectant expression. “If I didn’t know better I’d say that you’re actually into this guy.”

  “Good, then it’s working,” I said, ignoring the little flutter in my belly as I released a fat curl and started on another section. Jace loved playing with my hair and I loved any excuse to have his hands on me. “Hopefully, his ex has been lurking on his social media and is green with jealousy.”

  “Are you sure that’s all this is?” Rachel asked, not quite buying my act. “You guys seem to be really getting into this charade. I mean, kudos to you for going above and beyond, if that’s all you’re doing but, to me, you seem legitimately into this guy. I’m worried you’re getting yourself into a bad spot emotionally.”

  “No worries. After this is all over, we’ll walk away as friends, nothing more.”

  That’ll suck balls. The voice in my head was not being helpful, per usual, but now wasn’t the time to rewrite the rules. It wasn’t fair to Jace. I couldn’t exactly admit to Jace that each night I touched myself I came to the fantasy of Jace’s body all over mine. I would die a million times over if I saw rejection in his eyes at my confession.

  “What if he feels the same way?” Rachel asked.

  “He doesn’t,” I said a bit too quickly. “I mean, we both feel the same. We’re doing this for a purpose. We’re on the same page. We have rules for a reason.”

  “So what are these rules?”

  “I told you, no sex.”

  “So you kiss and stuff?”

  “Well, yeah.”

  Rachel looked calculating as she tried to puzzle out our arrangement. I probably should’ve ended this conversation three curls ago. “Wait, does that mean foreplay is on the table, just no penetration?”

  I paused, not wanting to answer, only because I’d danced around asking Jace the same question. Like I was going to say, ‘Hey Jace, I know we said no sex, but I’d really like to choke on your dick right now’ or ‘Hey Jace, your French kisses are out of this world but how are your Australian kisses, mate?’ “That’s probably not a good idea,” I muttered, shooting her a dark look, mostly because it was advice I needed to hear myself. “We’re trying to keep things simple. Sex just complicates things. Feelings get involved.”

  “You’re saying feelings aren’t involved already?”

  “I didn’t say that.” I couldn’t lie but that wasn’t Jace’s fault and I wouldn’t make it his problem. “But I’m sticking to my part of the deal. And you know what? I’m having fun for the first time since Drake broke my heart in a million pieces so I call that a win.”

  Rachel couldn’t argue that fact. “True. It’s nice to see you smiling again. So where are you going today?”

  I released a sigh. “Cardinals game.”

  Rachel’s eyes bugged as I knew they would. “You’re a Cubs fan.”

  “I know but Jace thinks he’s going to sway me by taking me to a Cardinals game. He’s springing for the tickets and all of the snacks so I figured, what the hell. It’s still better than doing nothing, right? Besides, it makes for good pics.”

  “Maybe don’t do it for the pics. Do it for you.”


  I smiled. “You worry too much, Rach,” I said, fluffing my hair out. “I love you for it but you can relax. I promise you my heart isn’t going to get broken. I’m good. I’m having fun.” I did one final look in the mirror before presenting myself to Rachel for approval. “How do I look?”

  “Gorgeous,” Rachel decreed. “As always.”

  I pressed a kiss against her cheek and grabbed my coat, pausing to ask, “Do you think it would be pushing my luck if I wore my Cubs jersey?”

  “Definitely.”

  “Yeah, I thought it might.”

  I left Rachel and met Jace at the Metro station. My heart flipped in my chest at the immediate sight of his handsome face. I melted against him as if it were totally natural when he folded me into his arms to murmur, “Mmmm, you look amazing.”

  I tried not to read too much into his compliment but I fairly preened like a bird trying to find a mate at his sweetness. “You’re just trying to butter me up so I don’t start yelling at your pitcher,” I said. “You’re just lucky I didn’t wear my Cubs jersey.”

  “Is it some kind of karmic balance that the hottest woman on the planet would have the worst taste in baseball?” he teased.

  I lightly pinched him in the ribs with a fake mean scowl. “Don’t push it, mister.”

  “Just for that, I’m going to outfit you with a hat, a foam finger and a Cardinals jersey. By the time we leave the game, you’re going to look like the Cardinals biggest fan.”

  I couldn’t imagine anything more horrifying but the laughter that bubbled up inside me was sweeter than the cotton candy I planned to eat on his dime. I pulled him to my mouth for another kiss. “We’ll see about that.”

  For a soul-searing moment I forgot about the game, our arrangement, the fact that our train was nearing the station. All that mattered as Jace’s lips on mine and how I felt when his arms were wrapped around me. The world dropped away when I was tucked in the cove of his arms, safe, secure, and cherished.